My Mom's Gift

Tomorrow marks the sixth anniversary of my mom's death.  She comes into my mind frequently in my day.  She is always in my heart. 
I have written about my mom before, and I will write about her again as I grow as a woman, a mom and as a woman of faith.  In fact, as I grow as a woman of faith, my relationship with my mom strengthens.  I am sorry that I was unable to share with her, her faith.  I am sorry that when she was healthy and able to share, I was too combative or too distant to share. 
In 1986, my parents took a six week trip to Hawaii, New Zealand and Fiji.  When they came home we had a little party for them.  I found myself leaving the party to go to the privacy of my room.  I cried uncontrollably.  I never understood why I was so overwhelmed with emotion.
Until she died.  Then it all came together.  That night in 1986 when my mom came home overwhelmed me with joy and relief.  The morning in 2006 when my mom went home for good, I was again overwhelmed with joy, and relief.  I cannot really describe what it was like when I knew that she had gone home.  But there was no doubt, no doubt in my heart at all, that my mom had gone home to be with her parents, and her Lord. 
My faith shifted that morning.  There was no lightening bolt from above, but rather a gentle nudge.  A mother's hand upon my shoulder guiding me through the days that followed.  I came to understand what it was that my mom desired above all else.  I came to understand what it was to have a faith that was unwavering. 
My mom had given me so many gifts that I continue to cherish today, but none, not even my Fisher Price Castle can compare with the gift of faith that my mom gave me on the day she went home.