There has been a lot happening these past couple of weeks and I have not found the time to write. I hate not finding the time to write. I love this and it is so much fun for me to put my thoughts to keyboard. I cannot even say what has kept me away, I just know that I am always doing something, else.
I started walking a couple of weeks ago. I have logged over 45 miles so far. I love that I have started walking. I usually spend an hour a day, depending on the rain, hitting the pavement. I listen to my Pandora station and just walk. I sort things out in my mind. I make big plans. I miss Barron.
I started packing for the London trip. I have my giant suitcase open on the table. I put clothes in and take clothes out because I want to wear them. I want to be sure that I have cute outfits. I want to be sure that I have comfortable outfits. I want to be sure that I do not look like the typical tourist in jeans and bright white tennis shoes! London should be a little cooler than it is here. It will also be a little rainier. I have to remember those things. I also have to remember that I don't want to overpack so there is room for souvenirs. I plan to bring back plenty of souvenirs!
I have joined a new church group. The church group meets on Monday nights, but does require so at home reading, thought and prayer. I spent much of last Sunday reading and thinking. This week there hasn't been any reading, but a lot of thought and prayer. I am not sure if this group is a good place for me, and I have been looking for an answer, praying for an answer. I haven't gotten one yet, unless I have and haven't been able to tell. So I have made the commitment to see this through.
I have been painting the room in the basement. Danny has been working on getting all the construction elements wrapped up and I have been painting when I can. He has been busy with school so getting to the construction has been hard. We made this little project a lot more complicated than we needed to, and are now paying the price for that. But we have to have this little space complete before we head to London because Ashlyn is going to sleep there when she gets back.
So there are many of the things that have kept me from blogging. But there is one more thing, a thing that has not been around much in recent times. A funk. Part of it is the Barron Blues. I cannot get past this overwhelming sadness and loneliness for that dog. He seems to creep into every thought. I hope Harlow doesn't know because it would break her heart. If only she wanted to go on walks...
This funk though, is more than missing Barron. That is what bothers me. I have a pretty grand thing going here. My children are all well adjusted young people with good friends and good goals. My pets are healthy. My husband loves and cares for me. I am about to take a great trip. Money isn't as tight as it once was and the financial future continues to look bright. Not 150 watt bright, but brighter than a 40 watt, if that makes any sense!
So I don't know where this funk is coming from. But it weighs me down. It brings out my snarkiness. There have been four times in the past few weeks that I almost went full on Snarky. Had I, I would have lost a couple of friends, ruffled some family feathers and made my work environment pretty uncomfortable. The work thing was easy to let go, but the other three are still sort of brewing under the surface. I can't ever say anything about them because that wouldn't be cool...
I think it is probably not a coincidence that I am not funked when I am blogging. So I should make blogging a part of my day. I obviously missed it.
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