Night Trax...

The Eagles, Chicago and Toto, I despise them all.  And don’t get all ruffled up and start to tell me what a great band The Eagles is.  I know that they are a great band.  Just like Tom Brady is a great quarterback and we all know how I feel about him!

I suppose I should have started this blog with some sort of disclaimer:  the opinions expressed in this blog are of the author’s and you don’t have to agree with them, but they are right. 

Picture, if you will, pre MTV days at my house.  Music videos were on Friday nights after the Tonight Show. Aptly named Friday Night Videos.  And Night Trax on TBS!  That was on Friday and Saturday nights.  There you have it, my two nights of music videos.  If I did not catch Duran Duran and Spandau Ballet on one of those two nights, I had 6 to 7 days of just radio.  No John Taylor, no Roger Taylor.    

So there I am, on a Friday night circa 1984.  There is no remote for this television so I must get up, walk to the box on top of the TV and make the switch from NBC to TBS.  Thankfully, it was only a slight turn of the knob because TBS was channel 4 and NBC was channel 7.  On a good night, I would get a heavy rotation of The Cure, Thompson Twins, Duran Duran and Culture Club and then (Son of a Bitch) The Eagles, or one of the band members doing a solo project.  Well, I might sit through Don Henley, but if it was Joe Walsh or the creepy looking one, I would have to get up, take the seven or so steps to the TV, turn the knob three or four clicks and hope…

And what do I get “Hard to say I’m Sorry”.  Oh, Peter Cetra, you will be sorry if you continue to screw up my Friday night with this maudlin crap!  I am not interested in your 40 piece band; I would like some men in make up with better hair than me singing something poppy.  So, I turn the knob again and I hope…

And what do I see, that bitch dancing up against the fence.  Ok, she is probably a very nice person, that Mrs. Swayze.  But get off my TV.  Rosanna.  Seriously, am I supposed to buy into the crazy idea that Rosanna would be interested in the likes of that ragtag group of men.  Africa?  Yes, please sing about a continent.  Why don’t you follow that toe tapper with some other geography based song. 

Oh, I can go on and on.  Get a couple beers in me and I will.  Music television wasn’t made for the likes of them.  It was made for the likes of Billy Idol, WHAM, Pat Benatar and Aha!  Oh, and Bonnie Tyler.  Let's not forget Bonnie Tyler and her creepy school boys with their glow in the dark eyes.  And the horsehead, what the hell is that at one in the morning, almost a horror flick.

Say what you want about The Eagles, tell me of all their hits, their awards, their honors and accolades.  And I will tell you that they were an ugly group of men made for radio.

Her name was Rio and she danced upon the sand…