I went to a Pampered Chef party last night. It was hosted by one of my Farrells friends. Meaning I met her when we both worked out at Farrells. That is how all my friendships are described. By how I am friends with them. I have old friends, Army friends, my kids friends parents friends, Farrells friends, cop wife friends, work friends and church friends. Oh, and Facebook friends which is all of the above and then some. But none of these groups are very big.
And that is kinda sad. Am I not a good friend? I suppose to some, I am not. In fact, I know that there are a few Facebook friends that really don't like me, they are just being polite. I may have been unfriended by them by now.
But I want to be a good friend. I want to have these wonderful histories with these people. I want them to be a part of my life because they find me funny and enlightening and full of shit in a good way. Because that is what I find them. But I am afraid that they find me odd, annoying and full of shit in a bad way.
My oldest friends, the ones that knew me in high school and even earlier, were the ones that knew me in the troubled years. Sometimes they may have contributed to the trouble and sometimes they saved me from it.
I have a few Army friends. They knew me as I mothered my babies. They were sisters in arms as the menfolk went on training exercises and peacekeeping missions. I think because we were all in the same position, with kids similar ages, it was just so natural. Kind of like the mommy and me groups. We were Army and me groups.
My kids' friends' parents friends, say that three times fast. These friends have changed as my kids' friends have changed. We all hung out on the soccer sidelines and colorguard performances. I don't see these women as often as I used to, but I still count them as good friends. They all rallied around me when Danny went to Iraq, when my mom died and when Ashlyn was sick. They loved my kids like their own.
Farrells friends were who I sweated with. There were a lot of Farrells friends as different classes came through. There were different types of Farrells friends as well. There was one group that loved Danny and tolerated me. Then the rest of them loved me as much as they loved Danny (I hope). And I always felt fit and beautiful and energetic with the second group. They were also so supportive with Ashlyn was sick. It was so cool to see all those Save Ashlyn shirts sweaty and gross at the gym.
Cop wife friends are great. They seem to be as sarcastic as I am. We are all in different places in our lives. I haven't been a cop wife as long as some, and a lot longer than others. We have kids all different ages. This group is very eclectic. One thing we all have in common is the love of our man. And at the same time, a very low tolerance for their shenanigans. Like Army wife friends, these women know where I am coming from. They can understand my fears and frustrations in a way that some of my other friends cannot.
Work friends are also overlapping into friends. I don't have to make that distinction with them. They know my day to day fun and fears. Because they don't completely understand my homelife, work friends are great sounding boards. They bring a completely different perspective to my issues. We vary greatly in age (I'm the oldest) and background but we are commonly bonded by a hatred of coupon scammers and thieves, homewreckers and creepy mustache mailman.
My church friends are so sweet. They don't see me very often (though they have seen me five weeks in a row). They don't judge me, just are happy to see me. They always make me feel like I could be more involved with my faith and my church. I would like to have more church friends. I have been a member there for eight years and I probably know eight people.
And there are Facebook friends! I think all of the friends that I have already mentioned, except two, are my Facebook friends. I don't have a lot of FB friends, 157. I know them all, some more than others and some, only through Facebook. But that's ok. Because I have made some wonderful friends just by commenting on their status'. And some of those friends have come off Facebook and into real life, but because we are all so busy, we stay connected there.
So back to the Pampered Chef party. After the party was over and I wrote my check, the representative asked me if I would be interested in hosting a party. I declined saying I didn't have any friends. Well, I have 159, but 3 were there last night, and over a hundred live in another city, state or country. Then there are my 4 family members, they wouldn't come. So that leaves me with about 40 people. Half of which are men or teens. I could invite 20 women, but then I would have to clean my house to host a party and I already bought my stuff! But I didn't want to say that!.
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