There is a finite number of people that can sing a good Christmas song. There is the obvious, Bing, Dean and Frank. And all of those crooners that sound like those three. Johnny Mathis, he's got a mighty fine voice. Nat King Cole, let me say that one again, Nat King Cole. Rosemary Clooney. Burl Ives. Louis Armstrong. Boris Karloff. OK, that may be a stretch, but he does the best rendition of You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch.
The Mormon Tabernacle Choir is an excellent choice for those big religious numbers especially the Hallelujah Chorus. They do a nice job with that one but so did The Immaculate Conception Catholic Church Adult Choir from my youth. I loved, loved, loved it when Mom and Dad practiced that at home. I need to take a moment to remember that.
For the most part, there is no one alive today that ought to make a Christmas album using new material. All the good ones have been done and going out on a limb to try something new is not necessary. The Michael Buble's of the world can sing the classics, but this new stuff...not needed. I will also suggest an end to all ridiculously sappy songs that are about Christmas shoes, Christmas pants, Christmas cardigan sweaters with elbow patches.
If you are so inclined to a search of all the artists that have made Christmas albums, you will find that Billy Idol has recorded his own version of the classics. I love Billy Idol and I love White Christmas. But this? This is what keeps Bing Crosby from resting in peace (that and some other child rearing issues). There is a whole CD of Monster Christmas Ballads. I don't think there was a need for this CD.
When it comes to country music and Christmas, I am on the fence. Gene Autry has one of the greatest songs ever, so great that a movie was made from it. And from that movie came all kinds of trinkets and figures, toys and villages that now fill my dad's and my own house at Christmas! Martina McBride, Faith Hill and Cary Underwood are remarkable. But then there is the other side of country music, the too twangy. When I feel like I should be knee deep in horse poop instead of reindeer poop, well, it's too country.
When I think about my collection of CDs, I think of what is missing. From my dad's collection is, and my memory will be fuzzy, an album with Jack Benny on the front. There is a bit where Jack Benny plays Jingle Bells on the violin, just a few opening notes. Dad had made me a cassette of that album, but who has a cassette player now days? I don't even have one in my car. And my How the Grinch Stole Christmas read along album. I remember putting that on the record player, already in my pj's, book in my lap. It was like having the movie on DVD!
I love the religious and the secular. The serious and the silly. I love how the CD's of the old classics kept the scratchy record sound. I love that I can hear my dad singing right along with Bing and Dean. Christmas music is such a gift. It takes me back to the record player and the red record. Yes, it was a red record. The cover of the album was kind of like a stain glass window. It was so exotic! And we could dance, but we couldn't jump because the needle would jump.
When we got M-TV, Bing Crosby and David Bowie's rendition of Little Drummer Boy was in high rotation. I don't know if I liked the song but I liked that my dad would tolerate David Bowie for a moment because he was singing with Bing Crosby. Now the song is just another Christmas warm fuzzy from my youth.
Another song from my youth that I DO LOVE is Christmas Bells. And it must be the version that has The Red Baron and Snoopy in it. Snoopy is battling The Red Baron over World War One France. It must have been Christmas, 1917. Terribly cold, Snoopy had ice on his wings. It didn't look good for him. The Baron, it was a Christmas miracle, did not shoot Snoopy even though he had him in his sights. Snoopy had to land behind enemy lines, a goner for sure, thought Snoopy. But the Baron had other plans. With a toast and a "Merry Christmas Mein Friend!" the Baron flew off. Oh, they would meet another day, but on Christmas, there was peace. What a freakin classic that song is.
And now, my own kids seek out the classics. The crooners and the Muppets are what classifies as classics to them! Ashlyn is a bit more of a purist and does not start listening to Christmas music until after Thanksgiving, but not Hayley, she is tuned into 104.1 as soon as they make the
There is one song that does not meet any of my criteria to be an acceptable Christmas song. It is not sung by any of the approved; it is sung by many of the unapproved. It's sappy. It's maudlin.
It's Christmas time, there's no need to be afraid
At christmas time, we let in light and we banish shade
And in our world of plenty, we can spread a smile of joy!
Throw your arms around the world at christmas time
But say a prayer - pray for the other ones
At christmas time
it's hard, but when you're having fun
There's a world outside your window
Go on, finish the song...you know you want to!
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